Yes, I watched the Super Bowl.
By watched, I mean I ran into the room to watch the commercials, the halftime show, and the last 1 minute and 42 seconds of the game.
Yes, I enjoyed Charlie and his Tide series of ads. Of course the Jason Momoa one cracked me up. (What was that one for, anyway? I mean, yeah, great commercial, but who was selling what? And if I can’t remember, it sort of defeats the purpose, right?)
My fave was probably Bill Murray reenacting the Groundhog Day movie, and yes, now I want to buy a Jeep.
I also loved the Doritos one, although the kid with the time machine will always be my number one.
And where were the Coke commercials? Did I miss it when I ran to the bathroom (because I forgot that Super Bowl Sunday is the one day of the year that you do not take your bathroom break during the commercials)? I love me some polar bears, so definitely noticed that they were missing.
Oh yeah, shout out to Ellen and Portia for that hilarious Alexa ad. Hammertime was funny, Little Caesars with the sliced bread was chuckle-worthy, and Snickers was cool, especially when the selfie couple fell into the hole.
I didn’t hate the Mtn Dew one, although I cannot fathom how it can possibly taste like Mtn Dew without a pound of sugar. The Facebook groups one was decently interesting. And the Quibi one just made me say, “Seriously? Another social media platform?” Jimmy Fallon working out had potential but overall was eh, which I hate to say because I love me some Jimmy Fallon normally.
And then there was the Google ad. Jesus H. Christ, Google. Is the middle of the Super Bowl the time and/or place to bring the entire damn (drunken) world to tears? Did you broker an under the table deal with Kleenex? My God, I think I need grief counseling after that commercial.
Now that those are out of the way, let’s talk Shakira and JLo.
And before we go any farther, can I just give a shout out to two middle-aged women who look better than most of us did in our twenties? High fives all around, ladies. You rocked those outfits, you rocked that stage, you rocked the world. You just plain rock.
(I feel like I should add a disclaimer here that I am not a fan of pop music. I am a rock girl. That’s not to say I don’t appreciate a good pop song—I hear Shawn Mendez so often thanks to my teenage daughter that I can sing his lyrics in my sleep and yes, I do not change the dial when he comes on the radio, even when my daughter is not in the car with me. But my point here is, these two women sing music I don’t normally go out of my way to listen to, which I think makes my assessment of their show even more impactful, because, like I said above, they. Rocked. It. All of it.)
I loved it. I thoroughly enjoyed those fifteen minutes of my life. I’m glad I watched it and I’m glad the NFL or whoever is responsible for halftime entertainment signed them up.
I loved their outfits. Yes, Shakira’s did look like her character from Zootopia and I kinda hope that was on purpose. I loved JLo’s leather with a tiny bit of lace peeking out, and then I loved it more when she did a 0.0000000009 second wardrobe change and I realized the lace was an entirely different outfit.
I loved how sexy they were. Women have a right to be, to feel, to look sexy while at the same time being strong and powerful and entertaining the world and honoring their heritage(s), and these two nailed it.
I loved that JLo’s daughter came out on stage and sang with her and I have no idea who those two guys were, but I don’t even care because Shakira and JLo owned the stage and didn’t need anyone else. (Although there was certainly a huge entourage of helpful dancers out there.)
So, like I said, I watched the Super Bowl. And I liked it. A lot.
Wait, who won again?
(Just kidding. I know the team from Kansas did. City, I mean. Kansas City.)